Dating is often a beautiful and enjoyable time. In addition to the process of getting to know each other, many people are happy because they can express their love to the heart. But dating is often colored by conflict. Public opinion says money matters are often a sensitive matter in relationships. Many relationships break down and end up not working well because of money. Especially if you decide to lend money to your girlfriend.
The reality is that this doesn’t just include romance. Too often because of money, family relationships, friendships and even professional cooperation can be devastating. Sometimes, the intention is to help a loved one, but misbehavior can lead to personal discomfort and loss.
Loan Money to Girlfriend? Please reconsider
You need to consider a few things before lending your girlfriend money. When it comes to debt, make no mistake, this often leads to conflict. That means there are risks and consequences enough to risk if both parties are not good at managing relationships.
So, the girlfriend asked for a loan? First of all, it’s a good idea to consider a few things before deciding whether or not to lend money to your girlfriend. You and your girlfriend definitely want to keep your relationship forever.
Loan Money to Girlfriend, For What?
Before lending money to your girlfriend and avoiding conflict, find out what her background is. For what? Is it to meet urgent and urgent needs, or can it be delayed? You will want to determine if your girlfriend is in dire need of money for something important and in the short run.
You also need to consider all the risks and consequences from both sides, both positively and negatively. If you decide to lend, it requires honesty and a foundation of trust from both sides to keep things going. Also, you and your partner definitely want to keep your relationship healthy and harmonious.
To be sure and to be underestimated, if your girlfriend is in love, she won’t be mad if you can’t or don’t want to lend her money.
Why do you have to find out why your girlfriend borrowed money? Simple , because it’s your money and she’s your girlfriend. Everyone dating is definitely meant to be able to move on to the more serious step of marriage. It is natural that you two are reminded to manage your finances effectively and efficiently.
So, you will also want to know if he in the past often lends money to others like his girlfriend, friends and others. If so, does he always pay on time? Learn and find out first.
You don’t want to be a false hopeful, so don’t promise anything if you’re not sure you’re willing to lend your money. Carefully consider all of the above facts carefully so that they are not wrong in taking steps.
Help as Well as you can
Before lending money to your girlfriend, you have the right to refuse to lend your money if it turns out that your boyfriend just needs a loan for a less important or urgent need. You do love your girlfriend, but don’t force yourself. If you can’t, it’s fine. Help only to the extent that you can afford to remember that reckless help must be in the form of money.
You also have the right to refuse strictly if it turns out that your girlfriend only borrowed money to pay off her other debts, for example. On the contrary, it may be that your decision will be a different story if it turns out that the boyfriend is borrowing money to help his parents’ economy. The important thing is to make sure that the need is not for consumerism, as you have your own needs.
For example, if your girlfriend intends to lend you a huge amount of money and is beyond your financial reach, then don’t force it. You can help her find another solution. If your own situation is not conducive, do not force yourself by borrowing from others. Think about the risks and consequences as this will only complicate the problem.
For alternative options, you may be able to introduce your partner to the party if he or she can provide the loan he or she needs. But keep in mind that this kind of recommendation assistance also requires a strong foundation of trust because your reputation is at stake.
Thus, measuring your own capacity to provide help can help you avoid getting caught up in difficult situations later on.
Define Clear Rules and Limitations
Before lending money to your girlfriend, you also need to set clear rules and boundaries so that your deal is mutually beneficial to both parties. Set detailed deadlines and rules for paying down debt.
Do you also need to determine if your money will be returned in cash or in installments? This is all to be done and agreed on so clearly that it will not lead to further misunderstandings.
For example, borrowing money from your girlfriends amounts to tens of millions, so you will want to determine how much of a nomination your boyfriend should pay each month, as well as how long the repayment period is agreed upon.
Realistically, love can fade and disappear especially if it turns out that he is not good enough to pay back his debt to you. Worst consideration, such an outburst can be a big problem for your relationship. What if something unexpected happens and you break up before he finishes his debt? What will happen next? Are you going to give up your money?
Please first discuss and put the important points of this loan back into your agreement. That way, both parties will feel good and comfortable. Once all the rules and restrictions have been agreed upon, make a written agreement with the mattress and involve the witnesses when transacting as needed.
Don’t Get Used
For example, your girlfriend has once, twice borrowed money. If the payment is always smooth and timely and still within reasonable limits, that’s fine. However, do not let this happen too. Especially if the frequency is too frequent and the reason is starting to make no sense.
Don’t lend money to your boyfriend carelessly. As a smart, intelligent and careful person, you want to make sure that he is just using you or truly loving you. If it’s a habit, it’s a risky situation for you and your finances.
In this case, you also need to observe and analyze how you use money. Is he the type of person who tends to just throw in his money but doesn’t make a lot of money?
Remember, if it becomes a habit for your girlfriend to borrow money often, then you need to be careful about whether or not your romance is genuine. You definitely want to keep your relationship healthy and harmonious. So be aware of any signs of infidelity. Because his love for you can only be based on the money you have.
Without being stingy, you can lend your money after making sure that your needs are urgent, and if they are not able to lend to others. Imagine if you were a parent. Unfortunately, you want your child to be independent in everything, and this includes his financial skills and independence.
In short, if it’s too frequent and even a habit, it doesn’t educate. As a good partner, you definitely want to train each other to better manage your personal finances.
For that, study your partner’s situation. If he is well-intentioned and is committed to the long term, then his partner will understand this. In fact, he will try his best not to borrow any more money from you.
Dare to Reject
Sincere love and affection for someone will always give us the best. The same is true of sincere love and affection for the couple. Even so, you also want to be loved sincerely and not taken advantage of. See if your partner will change your attitude if you refuse to lend him your money.
If your boyfriend’s reason seems to be weak, then you have to boldly reject his request. Basically, you always want to give her the best. The question is, what about him? Does he always want to give you the best?
One of the keys to a healthy and good relationship is that both parties always give their best. However, debt is not a healthy and good habit.
To that end, study the situation and push back boldly if you are unknowingly catching some oddity. Make sure your spouse needs the funds you need for a delayed or just because your girlfriend is impatient to wait for the money to accumulate, for example.